Merry “Christ”-mass

Christmas was implemented to create control and thus later turned into materialism, judgement and making kids dumber than they already are. I do love Christmas though, just not with the ‘Christ’ in Christmas; and I’m not an insecure Jew either or a waste-of-life politically-correct cunt-sucker, I’m just not really too fond of how the public perceives Jesus and built him up into what he is and even what he isn’t. There is nothing more beautiful than the ambient lights glistening amongst the frost covered air; there is also nothing more infectious than the smell of lung-cleansing pine trees. The ideas and traditions of Christmas were created out of thievery and lack of originality. Christians, during the Romans reign of the early 300s AD, like usual, were attempting to convert pagans (any non-Christ believers) into Christians because Christianity was the new hype thanks to Emperor Constantine; from then on the Christians wiped out and killed more and more people than any other religion ever has and they’re now the victors of organized religion and even societal thought.

When attempting to convert these polytheists (believers of multiple gods), they found their traditions to be rather intriguing. In Norse mythology Oden is their mythological Santa, and in Greece during the 4th century, Saint Nicholas of Myra was the jolly Christian that used to give gifts to the poor. The Germanic and Norse peoples celebrated Yule, being the change of seasons, the end of harvest and the winter solstice. Once the Christians realized they can take their cool traditions and convert them, they got the Pope on board and then he declared the birth of Jesus to be on December 25th 336AD. This all happened in Rome, while a dictatorship and monarchy were going on; all with a shit-load of murder and killing, murder and killing. What’s the difference between murder and killing? Well – in the head of a narcissistic sociopath, murder is tragic and only for theater and killing is done in the name of purpose; or in their eyes “God” and Jesus Christ.

Skipping ahead to our more modern Christmas, now celebrating a dead dictator and waiting for a creepy and fat bully, that determines whether a snot-nosed kid is going to get coal or a gift, to sneak down the chimney expecting for the woman of the household to leave him cookies and a glass of milk to further his type-2 diabetes and high blood pressure – Santa sure sounds like a judgmental chauvinistic prick to me. With that being said, I hope I didn’t just open up some feminist extremist’s snatch, releasing a wind of sadness and a lack or purpose with a loud queef – eager to jump onto a new idea, that being in Santa’s lap.

The myth of Santa that is being told to children is odd. I don’t want children to not believe in the magic of the universe and this world, but I also don’t think we need to make the youth of today anymore stupid than they already are. In a way Christmas and their belief in Santa does prepare them for life and societies endless demands, expectations and disappointments: you better behave yourself or you don’t get shit, sometimes you don’t get the gifts you want, and later when they become of age, the biggest disappointment and act of betrayal – Santa isn’t real. And from then on your children will never trust a word that you say. Materialism and consumerism are running rampant in this day and age, thanks to social media. The idea of happiness resides in how much shit you have – and when you have enough shit, you want more shit, because – why not? It’s supposed to make you happy; these things – this shit.

Gift-giving for Christmas wasn’t even a thing up until the Victorian era in the 1800s, thus later gaining traction in the United States in the early 1900s. Once parents realized they can bribe their children with gifts in order to get them to behave for the rest of the year, all became history; parents got peace, stores got money and then those stores became companies and those companies became corporations – at least little Janet stopped being a twat and at least little Billy stopped drawing penises all over walls in crayon.

I don’t care about the name ‘Christmas’ or any other labels or words, they don’t offend me or make me cringe because I simply have better things to do. Culture and tradition are deeper than religious principle; and though many people think this day is to celebrate some dead dildo’s made up birthday or to keep your kids under control by bribing them with the gift they want, all in all, this Holiday and others, are here to relieve stress and to bring family and friends together and promote gratitude, love and good food – organized religion likes to take praise for that, but truthfully, I hold humans on a higher level and know that it’s not their belief systems based upon what they’ve been told or brought up in, it’s simply the natural human condition that is responsible for the cheerfulness and universal love of others and each other.

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